


The Answer to Our Lives

by orphan_account, Winchesterek



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Angst, Dubious Consent, Emotional Infidelity, Endgame Sterek, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Heterosexual Sex, Homosexual Sex, Knotting, M/M, Marriage, Mates, Mating, Oral Sex, Rimming, Time Travel, Vaginal Fingering, lying by omission
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-06
Updated: 2015-06-06
Packaged: 2018-04-03 05:44:02
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,332
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4089133
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Winchesterek/pseuds/Winchesterek
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Heartbroken after an argument with Derek, Stiles wakes up in the future married to someone he doesn't expect.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Answer to Our Lives

**Author's Note:**

> Written for BiteTime Fest on Tumblr!
> 
>  
> 
> If you need detailed information for the tags, please check the end notes.

_Stiles’ heart was racing in his chest as he stood almost frozen, hands on Derek’s face, lips pressed against his. He was kissing Derek. Kissing Derek Hale. It was something that Stiles had always fantasized about in high school and now that he was a high school graduate and going to college in the fall, his wants were no different. Stiles gave a sound of protest when hands gripped his arms and pulled them away from Derek’s face firmly, easing him back. He opened his eyes confused then horrified that Derek was pulling back._

_“Stiles, stop,” Derek said. “You shouldn’t be doing this.” Derek released Stiles’ arms and took another step back, expression blank._

_“What? Why? I -” Stiles swallowed against the thickness of his throat, willing himself to speak, wishing he could find the words he always seemed to have. “Derek…”_  

_“I don’t know what you’re expecting from me Stiles.” Derek moved to the couch and sat down, making a disgusted face when he looked down at his shirt, still saturated with blood. He lifted the hem and poked gingerly at the still healing slash marks on his stomach before dropping his shirt back down. “Why are you even here?”_

_“You almost died! Again.” Stiles sighed and ran his hands over his face. Almost dying was apparently something Derek couldn't avoid, no matter how hard he tried. “I came to see how you were doing. I was worried.”_

_“That doesn’t explain the…” Derek gestured vaguely at his mouth._

_Stiles tried to look anywhere but at Derek. “I’ve had feelings for you for a long time. I thought that maybe… but I guess I was wrong.”_

_“Stiles,” Derek said, his voice gentler. “It wouldn’t be a good idea. You have your whole life ahead of you and I’m a disaster. Even if I did have feelings for you, I wouldn’t do that to you.”_

_“But you don't, right? Cause in what bizzaro world would that ever happen,” Stiles said, voice hurt and slightly bitter. “But I guess it isn’t unimaginable. I’ve had like one girlfriend my entire life and you know, that didn't last either.”_

_“I’m sure you’ll find someone,” Derek said. “I just don’t think it’s me.” He stood up and plucked at his shirt again, toeing off his shoes. “You’ll get to college and plenty of people will appreciate you for who you are and you’ll forget all about me.” Despite the words coming out of Derek’s mouth there was a look suspiciously like regret on his face. “You should go home. I’d like to clean myself up.”_

_Stiles felt like he was choking on unspoken words of rage and hurt – of pain. He thought getting over Lydia would be the worst heartbreak he’d ever felt, but they’d ended up becoming best friends and now… Stiles didn't think he’d ever felt this kind of rejection before. Rejection from someone he thought might_ actually _have feelings for him. “Right. Because how could I ever expect anything else from you.” Stiles shook his head and tried not to let Derek see how hurt he was, but he knew he wouldn't be able to mask the scent he was sure he was giving off. “I guess Scott was right. He told me to never fall for you, but I apparently have a thing for wanting unobtainable people.” Stiles turned and headed for the loft door. Wanting to be anywhere but near Derek._

_“Stiles, wait,” Derek called out, but Stiles kept going, leaving Derek alone in the loft._

***

Stiles blinked awake, staring at the ceiling fan as his heart ached. He sighed and tried to lift a hand to run over his face, but his arm was trapped. He frowned and turned his head to see a strawberry blonde laying on it, fast asleep. Stiles froze. There was a very naked _Lydia_ in bed with him, barely covered by the sheet draped over her hips. Stiles felt his chest tighten, willing himself not to have a panic attack then tried to pull his arm out from under her head.

“Awake already?” A sleepy Lydia mumbled into her pillow. “I thought I tired you out last night?”

Stiles felt like he might just have a heart attack. _Tired him out last night._ And they were _naked_. It could only mean one thing. “Oh god.” Stiles yanked his arm out from under Lydia’s head. “What on earth happened last night?”

“What are you talking about?” Lydia asked, turning her head and looking up at him. “We went to Scott and Allison’s for dinner, then we came home and I rode you into oblivion.” She leaned up and kissed Stiles’ jaw. “You’re welcome, by the way.”

Stiles couldn't breathe with Lydia this close to him and _naked_. Lydia was _naked_ and kissing him and talking about riding him. He was pretty sure his brain had short circuited at some point, especially since this was one of his earliest high school fantasies. He had to be in a coma somewhere, making this all up in his head. That was the only reasonable explanation. “I - I think I need to go to the bathroom.”

“You look like you’re ready to pass out,” Lydia said, brow furrowed. “Do you feel sick or something?” She sat up in bed, not appearing to care at all that her breasts were exposed. She leaned forward and laid a hand on Stiles’ forehead.

“Or something. Yeah.” Stiles tried to look anywhere but at Lydia’s breasts. He couldn't help himself. He was a man after all and he’d fantasized about them for years. He had to admit they were nice breasts.

“Well, what is it then?” Lydia dropped down, her chin resting on Stiles’ chest. She dragged a hand through the hair on his chest, before tweaking his nipple. “You can tell me anything. You know that right?”

“Just a bad dream, I guess. I think I need to shower. Clear my head.”

Lydia rolled back onto the other side of the bed and stretched, arching her back. “Okay. You want me to join you?”

Stiles was sure he looked like a deer trapped in headlights, like Lydia was asking a trick question. When had she _ever_ joined him in the shower? When had they ever _had sex_? What the actual fuck was going on. “Uh, no. I think I’m gonna shower alone. Maybe later.”

Lydia shrugged. “Suit yourself.” She threw the covers off and stood up, bending over to get a nightie on the floor, slipping it over her head. “I can go start breakfast. Eggs alright with you?”

Stiles looked away quickly so he wouldn't stare. _Oh god._ He’d seen just about every part of Lydia now that didn't require further investigation to see. “Yeah. And maybe waffles.” That at least sounded like a normal breakfast. “We do have a waffle maker, right?”

“Just the one we got for a _wedding present_.” Lydia turned to eye Stiles up again. “What is with you this morning? Did Scott get you to smoke weed or something last night?”

The sounded reasonable enough to Stiles and sure as hell sounded a lot like the Scott he knew. “Yeah. That must be it. You know Scott’s always trying something new to test out that whole werewolves-can't-get-drunk-or-high-thing.” Stiles scrunched his face up, waiting for a reaction. Scott still had to be a werewolf in whatever weirdo world he’d been sucked into, right?

Lydia snorted with laughter. “I would’ve thought he’d given up that when he turned thirty. Well, hope springs eternal, I guess.” She shook her head and padded out of the bedroom.

_Thirty?!_ Stiles jumped out of bed as soon as Lydia was gone and hurried to the restroom, closing the door behind him and locking it. He stared at it for a second longer before he turned to look at himself in the mirror. “Well, okay then.” Stiles stared at his very toned body that had muscles he didn't even knew existed before and he had a lot more hair on his chest than he’d had last night. His hair was longer and he looked older, but still the same. It was a lot to take in and he just stared at himself for a few minutes before something gold and shiny caught his attention. Sure enough, there was a wedding ring on his finger. He still couldn't believe he was married to _Lydia Martin_. It was the only thing he’d wanted since he was three and had Lydia ignored his existence. How on earth could this happen?

Stiles forced himself to shower then picked through his very adult clothes and found ones that resembled how he used to dress. He pulled them on and joined Lydia for breakfast. Breakfast was awkward at best, even though Lydia didn't seem phased by his behavior. She must be used to it by now since they were married. After breakfast he excused himself and went to the only place he could think of going.

Stiles raised his hand and knocked on the front door, waiting anxiously for his best friend to answer.

The door opened to reveal a _very pregnant_ Allison. She smiled and said, “Stiles! What are you doing here so early?”

“Oh my god you’re pregnant!” Stiles stared at Allison, wide-eyed. He thought his brain might explode. “Oh. Right. Uh… is Scott here?”

“Yeah.” Allison stood aside for Stiles to walk in, looking puzzled. “He’s out back, weeding the garden.”

Stiles stepped into the house, still looking at Allison, trying not to reach out and touch her to make sure her stomach was real and not some fake baby belly. “Sorry,” he said when he realized she was looking at him strangely. “I’ll go,” he motioned over his shoulder then turned and headed towards the back yard.

“Stop being weird!” Allison called after him.

“Never!” Stiles shouted back, the exchange oddly familiar. It gave him comfort that at least one small thing hadn't changed as he stepped outside. He paused, seeing Scott. He looked almost exactly the same. Damn werewolf genetics and aging. “Hey.”

“Hey, dude,” Scott said. He was kneeling on the grass, a pile of weeds between his knees. He reached out with a gloved hand and pulled up another clump of weeds from the small garden plot in front of him. “What’s up? I thought Lydia was planning on keeping you in bed all day today?”

Apparently him and Lydia at least had a good sex life that everyone seemed to know about. Except him. “Uh. So. Don't freak out. But I kinda have to get straight to the point here cause I don't know what else to do. I, uh - I’m not me. Well, me-me. I’m like _me_ from _after high school graduation_.”

Scott froze mid weed yank. “What? What do you mean?”

“Last night I went to bed in my room, at my dad’s house and this morning I woke up in bed with Lydia. _Lydia Martin._ I’m supposed to be going to college in a few weeks and ignoring my lack of love life and -” Stiles motioned his hands wildly. “Where on earth am I? And we’re _thirty?!_ ”

“You mean you have amnesia?” Scott stood up and stripped his gloves off, looking concerned. “That was twelve years ago.”

“ _Twelve. Years._ ” Stiles was sure he looked like he might faint. “I don't have amnesia. I was like… transported into the future. Or something. There’s definitely something supernatural going on here. It’s like ‘Back to the Future’ but in reverse.”

“But how do you know you don’t have amnesia? Isn’t that more likely?” Scott crossed his arms over his chest. “I know we’ve dealt with some pretty weird stuff, but Back to the Future? That would be a new one.”

“In reverse,” Stiles added. He sighed and ran his hands over his face, which he was beginning to think he would be doing a lot with the headache that was coming on. “I just know. Okay? When have you ever been unable to trust me? And I thought we agreed that you should always listen to me for the sake of your wolfly-hood. How many times was I right about evil things in the past?”

Scott held his hands up and shook his head. “Okay, okay, I trust you.” He put his hand on Stiles’ shoulder. “We’ll figure this out.”

Stiles deflated and looked lost. “I feel like I don't even know what to do with myself. I don't want to hurt Lydia, but I don't even know what our life is like. Like, how on earth did we even get married in the first place? We are best friends and I’m eighteen and in this future world we’re married and thirty.”

Scott pulled Stiles into a hug and held him tightly. “Don’t freak out. There’s an explanation for this and we’ll find it.” He pulled back, holding Stiles by the shoulders. “Why don’t we talk to Deaton. Besides you, he’s still the top authority on anything weird.”

Stiles nodded. “Yeah, okay. I just - I didn't know who else I could trust without hurting anyone.”

“I’m glad you came to me, buddy.” Scott cuffed Stiles on the ear. “You know I’m always here for you. Even if your brain is regressed to teenage you.”

“Hey!” Stiles smacked Scott on his abdomen. “You’ve always been a teenager. I’m sure you still are. Even if you have a baby on the way.” Stiles couldn't help but grin at that. “I’m happy that it worked out for you.”

“Thanks,” Scott grinned. “Who would’ve thought, right? Chris actually likes me now. He even gave me permission to ask Allison to marry me. Awesome, huh?”

Stiles laughed at that. “Yeah I would’ve never seen that coming.” Stiles glanced back towards the house. “So, Deaton, huh? I guess I should go see him and figure out what’s going on.”

“I can go with you,” Scott said. “Let’s go now.” He tugged Stiles towards the house and through the back door. “Hey, Ally? Stiles and I are going to Deaton’s. Supernatural stuff.”

Allison looked up from the book she was reading visibly tense. “What?”

“Nothing dangerous, don’t worry, babe.” Allison’s face relaxed and she turned her head upwards for a kiss. Scott gave her a peck and she waved as the two of them as they headed out the door.

***

So, it was some kind of spell. They knew that much. Stiles sighed as he pushed his key into the door and unlocked it, walking into the house he logically knew was his and Lydia’s, but it was unfamiliar all the same. Now Stiles just had to wait for Deaton to figure something out and figure out how exactly it happened in the first place.

Stiles ran a hand through his hair and closed the door behind him then dropped his keys into the bowl at the door. He stripped his jacket off and hung it next to Lydia’s on the coat rack, kicked his shoes off and found her in the living room. “Hey,” Stiles said softly.

“Hey,” Lydia said back from where she was curled under a blanket on the couch. “What did you do today?”

“I went to see Scott. We went out.” Stiles didn't think she needed to know that they’d gone to see Deaton because then she’d know something supernatural was up and he’d have to tell her. The last thing Stiles wanted to do was to hurt Lydia. They may not be romantic in the past, but she was still his best friend and Stiles still loved her. “What did you do today?”

“The web conference with my colleagues in Boston,” Lydia said, patting the couch cushion next to her. “I thought I told you that?”

“I guess it slipped my mind.” Stiles moved to sit on the couch next to Lydia. “How did it go?”

“It went okay. Glad it’s over with though, I’ve been stressing about it for a month.” She shifted until she was facing Stiles. “But it slipped your mind?” She shook her head. “You’ve been off all day, Stiles. I’m worried about you.”

Stiles gave a sad smile and reached out to touch her knee to give it a squeeze. “I know,” he said softly. “It’s just been a day. I’ll be okay.” At least, he hoped he would be. He just had to wait to hear back from Deaton. “I’m sorry that I’ve been off.”

Lydia took the hand on her knee and gave it a squeeze in return. “I know you are.” She scooted closer to him and laid her head on his shoulder. “You know I just want to help you, right?” Lydia looked up at him, placing her hand on his cheek and tilting his head downwards before leaning forward and kissing him lightly.

Stiles was still as Lydia kissed him, arm around her. They’d kissed before. It was just different since they’d moved on from what his memories told him. Stiles had to remind himself that their relationship here was different. “I’ll be okay,” he assured her again when they parted.

Lydia watched his face, eyes searching. Finally, she nodded and sighed, sitting upright again. “It’s late, I think I’m going to get ready for bed.”

“Yeah, okay.” Stiles released her and leaned back against the couch. “You want me to come with?”

“If you want,” she said, before standing up and heading for the stairs. She tossed the blanket over the back of an armchair as she went.

Stiles wasn't sure what to do. He wanted to tell her the truth, but he couldn't do that and he felt like he was making all the wrong choices because he couldn't be whatever Stiles she knew in this world. After a few moments he resigned himself to getting up and following her upstairs to get ready for bed.

Lydia was already climbing into the bed, wearing one of Stiles’ old t-shirts. She pulled the covers up to her chest and sat, propped up against the headboard, watching him.

Stiles stood there a little awkwardly under her gaze, but reminded himself that he’d been completely naked with her this morning. He wasn't sure how they normally slept, but he didn't want to ask her and alert her to any more weirdness. Stiles stripped down to his underwear and slid under the covers next to her. “Are you cold?”

“A little,” Lydia admitted, sliding herself down until she was lying flat, her hair spread out on the pillow like a fiery radius.

“I can go turn the air up if you want me to,” Stiles said as he lay down and turned on his side to face her.

Lydia rolled her eyes. “Just come here,” she said fondly, pulling Stiles close and snuggling into his front.

“I just wanted you to be comfortable,” Stiles said, trying not to be awkward about touching. It wasn't as if they hadn't snuggled before, they were just wearing a lot less clothes than they usually did. Stiles sighed and tried to relax as he wrapped his arms around her.

“What’s going on?” Lydia whispered. “I feel like I have a stranger lying here next to me.” Her voice started to shake with emotion. “You can talk to me. I’m your wife, for God’s sake.”

“I know,” Stiles said softly, wrapping his arms around her tighter and burying his face against her hair. He tried to take comfort in the familiarity of the moment rather than the almost-no-clothes thing. “I was just thinking today, you know, about the past.”

Lydia nodded and stroked her hand down his side. “What about?”

“Just how everything’s so different than I thought it would’ve been. It’s not that I’m not happy,” he assured her. “You know that I love you. It’s just… been one of those days.”

“I have those days too,” Lydia whispered. “It’s just how it is.” She tilted her head back, eyes shiny with tears. “But I just do my best to stay here in the present. With you.”

“I’m trying,” Stiles said softly, moving his hand to brush her hair behind her ear. “It’s just hard sometimes.” Stiles smiled a little. “I can't believe Allison is pregnant.”

Lydia laughed quietly. “I can’t wait to see how big she gets before those twins decide to come out.”

“Yeah, well, she looks like she’s about ready to pop as it is.” Stiles smiled then and he could feel the pain ease a little. He studied Lydia and she was just as beautiful as ever. If he was being honest with himself, this wasn't how he thought his life would have turned out. He’d hoped that he’d get to spend it with Derek, even though that was some fantasy just like all his others. Except he married Lydia. Stiles knew that his life wasn't a bad one and what more could he ask for than marrying his best friend? “I love you,” he told her softly. “I’m sure it hasn’t been easy, but I do love you.”

Lydia reached up with one hand and cupped Stiles’ cheek. “I love you too,” she said, drawing him down for a kiss. “We’ve always been there for each other,” she murmured against his lips. “Don’t pull away from me now.”

“I’m trying not to,” Stiles said honestly. Stiles was quiet as his hand slipped down to Lydia’s hip and held her close. He didn't even know what he was going to do if he was stuck here and wouldn't be able to go back to the past. This would be his life. And he was married to Lydia-freakin-Martin. How lucky was he? He was sure tons of men and women all over the world were jealous of him for his dumb luck. “Right now I’m here with you…”

“So be here…” Lydia’s hand mirrored his, cupping his hip. “With me.”

Stiles could feel a nervousness bubbling up inside. At one point in his life, this would have been his greatest fantasy. He’d completely forgotten to even consider Lydia sexually when they’d become best friends. “Yeah, okay.”

Lydia tugged him closer and kissed him, deeper than she ever had before. She rolled them until she was on her back, his weight pressing her into the bed.

Stiles gave himself permission to kiss her back, melting against her lips. This was the last thing he’d ever thought he’d be doing, but some part of him had always wanted Lydia this way. She was his comfort and his rock and in this world, she was his wife, too. Stiles’ hand drifted under her shirt carefully and started to push it up her body as if he didn't have permission to.

Lydia’s legs parted, allowing Stiles to slot himself in between them. She arched her upper body slightly, pressing into his hand as it traveled upwards, sighing into his mouth.

When she didn't stop him, Stiles pushed the shirt all the way up and broke from the kiss to pull it off of her. He paused as he looked at Lydia’s body. She was fully naked and completely gorgeous. No wonder his future self had been working out to keep up with her goddess status. Stiles pressed his lips to hers again before pulling back enough to kiss against her neck and over her collarbone as he drifted down towards her breast. He didn't hesitate to draw her nipple into his mouth to tease it with his teeth then sucked.

“Stiles,” Lydia breathed. Her hand drifted to his head and she tugged lightly on his hair before scratching her nails down his scalp.

Stiles groaned against her breast as he felt himself harden and treated her other nipple to the same attention. He raised his head as he lifted himself just enough to reach down and pressed his fingers against her clit, rubbing her with gentle, circular motions. “Um, are you - still taking birth control? Or are we -” Stiles licked his lips, eyes heated as he studied her.

“What?” Lydia gasped, distracted, her hips pushing off the bed into Stiles’ hand. “Of course I am.” She drew in a breath, her head tilting back, neck arched. Lydia’s fingers dug into the back of Stiles’ neck, whimpers falling from her lips.

“Okay. I just had to ask, you know, cause Allison is pregnant and -” When he heard a familiar sigh, he shut right up. At least some things never changed. Stiles smiled a little at that, leaning forward to kiss her lips before disappearing under the covers. He kissed across her inner thigh as he settled onto the bed, pulling her hips forward with his other hand and dipped down to nuzzle against the perfectly trimmed hair of her sex.

Lydia’s legs trembled at his sides. “At least… you know one way to put that mouth of yours to good use,” she laughed, breathless. Her hands rested on his shoulders, squeezing rhythmically, her chest rising and falling rapidly with her breaths.

“Hey. I’m an expert at everything I do with my mouth,” Stiles mumbled against her before parting her lips and lapping against her clit. He was still reeling from the fact that he was a lucky bastard as he closed his mouth on it and sucked, swirling his tongue against it.

“Fuck!” Lydia gasped, hips shaking. “You better not stop,” she whined.

Stiles hummed, moving his hands to grip her hips and hold her firmly against the bed. He buried his face against her, opening his mouth and moaning as he licked and sucked against her clit. Stiles held her with one hand, letting his other drift down and press against her entrance. She opened up for him like he belonged inside of her and he groaned again as he curved his fingers upward to press against her g-spot.

“Stiles, _Stiles,”_ Lydia panted, her nails digging into his shoulders painfully. “I’m going to come, I’m going to come.”

Stiles quickened the pace of his tongue swirling and thrashing against her clit, putting more pressure against her gspot as he stroked her there. He moaned and rutted against the bed, lifting his face briefly to murmur, “Come for me,” before latching back onto her clit.

“Oh god, oh _god,”_ Lydia whimpered, before her thighs tensed and she let out a long cry, spasming around Stiles’ fingers.

Stiles licked and sucked against Lydia’s clit, pumping and stroking his fingers inside of her until her spasms faded into a twitch and her hands clutched at his shoulders again. Only then did Stiles draw away and kiss over her sex again then her inner thighs as he pulled his fingers from inside of her. “God, you’re beautiful,” he breathed, kissing across her hip.

Lydia laughed softly, petting through Stiles’ hair. “Get up here,” she murmured. “I want to taste myself on you.”

Stiles snaked back up her body and gave her a wet, open-mouthed kiss. He couldn't help but be hungry for her. She was gorgeous and perfect and right now his cock was straining against his underwear pressing against her hip. “Need to get in you.”

Lydia moaned into his mouth, swiping her tongue against his lips. She slid her hands into the waistband of underwear and pushed them down under his backside, before grabbing a cheek in each hand and squeezing, grinding her hips against his.

Stiles kissed her deeply, rocking against her. He could feel her wetness sliding against his dick as he pressed closer. Stiles reached down to grip his himself, rubbing the head of his cock against her clit before pressing against her entrance. He groaned as he sank into her heat, grinding hard. “Fuck.”

Lydia sighed as Stiles bottomed out. She lazily rotated her hips, lifting them to allow Stiles to get even deeper, her hands gripping his ass and pulling him in towards her.

Stiles kissed Lydia’s neck as he lazily thrusted into her, rocking and grinding his hips. It was a heady thing, something that Stiles never thought he’d experience, but there was something perfect about it. “I love you,” Stiles breathed against her neck, turning his face up to press a kiss against her lips. “God, Lydia. You’re perfect.”

Lydia dragged her fingers through the sweat pooling on Stiles’ back. “There you are,” she whispered, voice tender.

Stiles wrapped his arms around her, lifting her up and sitting back as he settled her on his hips. He kissed her hungrily, thrusting up into her heat. “Yeah,” he breathed. “Wanna fill you up. Fuck.”

Lydia rocked in his lap, her wetness slicking up where they were pressed together. Noises fell from her lips at every thrust. She fisted his hair in one hand, holding his head in place as she kissed him back, sharing panted breaths.

Stiles’ thrusts became hard and frantic, meeting her hips with each rock. He buried his face against her breasts, arms wrapped tight around her as he breathed in her Chanel perfume. If this was how the rest of his life was going to be, then he knew he would be okay with that. There could be worse futures than being married to the woman he admired, loved and respected. She was everything any person could want and even if it wasn't how Stiles thought his life was going turn out, it was still amazing. He had Lydia and that could be enough. “God. Fuck. I’m gonna come.”

Lydia arched back, her arms locked around Stiles' neck, changing the position of his thrusts as she jerked her hips more sharply. Her vocalizations had lost any semblance of speech, but they got louder the faster their bodies moved. She suddenly locked up in his arms and let out a wail, her head thrown back.

The feel of Lydia squeezing tight around his cock as he thrust pushed Stiles over the edge and he groaned with her, fucking up hard into her, hips jerking and bucking as he came. “Fuckfuckfuck!”

Breath whistling in and out of her, Lydia brought herself upright and dropped her head into Stiles' shoulder, her hips giving a lazy grind every few seconds. "That was amazing," she mumbled, lapping at the sweat on Stiles' neck.

Stiles huffed out a laugh and smiled, kissing over her shoulder as he held her close, running his hands up and down her back. “It’s not usually amazing?”

"Fishing for compliments now?" Lydia pulled back and smiled at him. "There are always levels of amazing, and tonight," she pecked his lips, "was top notch." Lydia squeezed her kegels, grinning mischievously.

Stiles gave a thrust in response, capturing her lips in another kiss. “Good. I’m glad. Especially after today.” Stiles ran a hand down to give her ass a squeeze and then a gentle smack, grinning.

Lydia yelped and laughed. "Don't get sassy, or I'll have to get out the harness." She shifted again in his lap and wrinkled her nose at the wet sounds. "Unless we want a soaked bed, we should probably get cleaned up."

Stiles wanted to ask about the harness, but that would go back to him being weird and the Stiles Lydia didn't know. “Yeah, okay. Come on Queen Lydia. To the bathroom!” Stiles lifted her up off of his dick so he could sit up and got off the bed, then grabbed her and tossed her over his shoulder.

Lydia squeaked and flailed. "I hope you know there's a good chance of you getting spunk on your shoulder this way." She reached down and gave his butt cheek a pinch.

“My mouth, fingers and dick were just all up in your business. I think I can handle a little spunk on my skin,” Stiles teased and gave her butt another swat. He chuckled, walking to the bathroom and put her down once they were inside.

"Such a gentlemen," she huffed, but her lips were curved up in a smile. She turned the shower on and stuck her hand in to test the water.

“Of course.” Stiles waited for her to get in and then joined her without asking, closing the shower door. “So what are you doing tomorrow?”

“I was going to take Allison shopping for baby clothes. If she thinks those twins are going to look anything other than perfect on my watch, she doesn’t know me very well.” Lydia tipped her head back and let the water run over her long hair, sighing contentedly.

“I’m sure she expects nothing less,” Stiles said with a small smile, washing himself. It didn't take long for them to clean up and Stiles wasn't surprised by how effective their showering was. It was a polished routine and before long, Stiles was climbing back into bed with Lydia curled against his side, pulling the covers up over them.

“A bit of a strange day, huh?” Lydia whispered, tracing her fingers along Stiles’ chest.

“Yeah,” Stiles said, dropping a kiss to the top of her head as he held her. He idly stroked his fingers along her back, trying not to think too much about what was going on so he wouldn't ruin the moment and make Lydia upset again with him acting different. But there were things that Stiles needed to know. “Why did you decide to marry me?” he asked softly.

“Because you asked,” Lydia said lightly.

“You know what I mean,” Stiles said and shook his head. “For years you wouldn't even give me the time of day and now we’re married. I guess sometimes it’s hard to believe.”

Lydia sighed. “Well… you know, when we went away to college together, we got closer.” Her eyes focused off into the distance, and her voice grew softer. “You know how I always thought that maybe... Jackson and I…” Lydia cleared her throat and laughed half-heartedly. “I got the invitation to his wedding in London and that was that.” She looked up at Stiles seriously. “And you were always there. We loved each other, you knew what I was and I could trust you. We moved in together after college and it seemed to work. We were happy. So when you proposed three years ago…” She laid her head back down onto Stiles’ shoulder. “I knew you would do your best to make me happy the rest of our lives. Even if it wasn’t what either one of us used to hope for.”

So then it wasn't an epic love story. Stiles couldn't say that he was surprised, but he knew that he did love Lydia, even if it wasn't the amazing type of love that people wrote stories about. At least not that he could remember. “But we’re happy, right? You’re happy? It seems like we have a pretty good life.”

Lydia tipped her head back up, chin propped on Stiles’ shoulder, looking him in the eyes. “Yes Stiles, we’re happy. I don’t regret marrying you.” She lay back down, sighing. “Not everyone was as lucky as we are.” Her eyes slid shut and she snuggled closer.

Stiles rested his cheek against her head. He knew he’d thought it before, but if this was how his life was supposed to be, then he’d be okay with that. Lydia was right. They could both have had it worse. They could be alone. At least they had each other and that was enough.

***

Stiles was up earlier than he ever thought he’d been in his entire life. When Deaton called, he’d gotten up and ready before Lydia woke, making sure to leave her a note. Stiles pulled into a parking space in front of the vet’s and sighed as he walked into the clinic. “Hello?”

Deaton appeared behind the counter almost noiselessly. “Stiles. It’s good to see you again.”

“Yeah. Wish I could say the same.” Stiles pushed his keys into his pocket. “So what’s the news?”

“I told you yesterday that this sojourn into your future was the result of a spell and that same spell accounts for the gap in your memories.” Deaton reached into his pocket and pulled out a small vial. “This tonic will allow those memories to surface, giving us a better idea of how the spell occurred, perhaps even showing who’s responsible.”

Stiles looked at the vial. It looked unappetizing. He frowned and took it from Deaton. “Is it safe?”

“Completely,” Deaton assured him. “It will be disorienting, so I suggest you take a seat before drinking it.”

Stiles sighed and went to take a seat then looked at the vial again. “This is going to be gross, isn’t it?” When Deaton gave him an unreadable look, he only looked at the vial again and took the top off. “Bottoms up.” Stiles downed it like a champion shot drinker and made a horrible face at the taste once it was down. “I think I might throw up.” He shuddered. “How long does it take?”

“A matter of moments,” Deaton said, face impassive.

Pain suddenly sparked at Stiles’ temple and he groaned, gripping his head with both hands. It felt like he was getting a massive migraine before the memories started to flood his mind. Bits and pieces flashed before they fully settled into place and he was groaning and nauseated by the time he could think clearly again. “It’s my fault,” he muttered. “I did this.”

For the first time since Stiles arrived, there was a flicker of expression on Deaton’s face. He looked both surprised and impressed. “You?” He took a seat next to Stiles. “A spell of this nature requires a tremendous amount of power.”

Stiles gave Deaton an annoyed look. “Why does everyone always underestimate me?” He rubbed his temples and rubbed his face.

Deaton chuckled softly. “I’ll remember to stop doing that. Now, what else do you remember?”

Stiles willed himself not to throw up. He still felt like he needed to hold onto the ground so he wouldn't fall off the earth. “I was unhappy, so I did the spell. It only lasts for 48 hours before I go back. It’ll end tonight.”

“In that case, I take it this means goodbye for now.” Deaton patted Stiles’ knee and stood up. “I strongly advise you get some rest to regain your equilibrium.” Without another word, he disappeared into the back room of the vet’s office.

Stiles rolled his eyes, but that made his head hurt worse. Deaton hadn't changed one bit in the past twelve years. It took Stiles several minutes before he could get up and walk back out to his car and even longer for him to feel any resemblance of normalcy. Stiles was pretty sure he’d fallen asleep in front of the clinic as he opened his eyes. The sun was definitely up. “I need to remind myself to carry sunglasses.”

Stiles pulled the visor down to block the sun from his eyes and pushed his keys into the ignition. Lydia was out today with Allison, so he didn't need to explain to her where he’d be. She wouldn't be home anyway to miss him. Stiles sighed and started up the car then pulled out of the lot. He ended up driving around for the better part of an hour before he realized what he was doing. Stiles killed the engine and rested his forehead on the steering wheel. “What on earth am I doing? It’s not like he fucking cares.”

Regardless, Stiles found himself getting out of his vehicle and walking up to the building he was pretty sure Derek still lived in and took the elevator up to the loft. Maybe it would be his lucky day and Derek didn't even live in Beacon Hills anymore. Stiles raised his hand and knocked.

The door slid open and there was Derek, his brow furrowed with confusion. “Stiles? What are you doing here?”

Stiles stared for all of five seconds before he started laughing. “Oh my god you have grey hair!”

Derek rolled his eyes and stalked away from the door. His hands reached up to self-consciously touch the whorls of silver starting at his temples. “You just noticed? I thought we were past ribbing me about this.” He flopped down onto his couch. “Peter’s the only one who keeps making jokes now.”

Stiles had to force himself to stop laughing. He cleared his throat and tried not to laugh again because honestly it was the last thing he expected. “Sorry. I just didn't think werewolves aged. Well… in the sense that you’d be fifty or so before you developed grey hair.” He stood at the door, not really sure if he should go inside or stay put. “So we talk then? In this reality, I mean.”

“My father grayed early too… and what do you mean this reality?”

Stiles was still standing outside the door in case he needed to make a quick escape. He wasn't sure he could handle the hurt he felt creeping around the edges of his heart as he watched Derek, remembering the last time he’d talked to him. “I’m pretty much eighteen-year-old me in thirty-year-old me’s body.”

“Okay…” Derek said, rubbing his temples. “Why not? It’s been a year or two since anything supernaturally crazy happened.” He looked up to Stiles, still standing in the doorway. “And to answer your question, no, we don’t really talk. We see each other at pack dinners at Scott’s house, but that’s about it.”

“Oh.” It hurt more than Stiles thought it would. _So much more_. “I guess that shouldn’t be that surprising after -” He licked his lips and looked down, sighing. Stiles couldn't imagine wanting to be around Derek after Derek broke his heart into a million pieces. It made sense.

“Yeah,” Derek said, echoing Stiles’ sigh. He crossed his arms and leaned back on the couch. “Why don’t you come in instead of just hovering there?”

“Because I don't know if I can,” Stiles said honestly. “I mean, the last time we talked, to me, was… less than forty-eight hours ago and you pretty much told me to fuck off.”

Derek’s head whipped to Stiles. “That’s not how I remember it. I wanted you to live your life, not get stuck in the disaster that is my life… and look at you, married to Lydia with a nice house. You have everything!”

“I don't have everything, you dipshit! I wanted you!” Stiles took a deep breath and tried to control himself. “Yeah, okay. My life with Lydia seems great, I’ll give you that. But it’s not what I’d hoped my life would be. I wanted all that with you and Lydia wanted that with Jackson. We’re just two friends that love each other and it works. It’s better than being alone… but I don't have everything.”

Derek’s face crumpled and he buried it into one of his hands. “Do you think it was easy for me. _Is_ easy for me? To watch you with Lydia?”

“Well you didn't seem to give a fuck when you broke my heart and you never came after me. I waited. And then I did this spell and ended up here. I’m sure present-me waited until three years ago when I apparently asked Lydia to marry me. But you didn't, did you? Cause I would’ve taken anything you’d give me. I know myself that much.”

“You just... you don’t understand,” Derek protested. He stood up, looking desperate. “I had to protect you, I _had_ to.”

“And you don't think that I want to protect _you_? How many times have you almost died. Literally. You’ve got like the worst luck. I just -” Stiles shook his head. “I’m in love with you and I wanted us to have this grand, epic love story. But we didn't.”

“That’s exactly it, Stiles,” Derek said. “I’m _poison_. Everything around me turns to shit. I’ve lost everyone I’ve ever loved.” He raked his hands through his hair before reeling and punching the wall. “And I couldn’t let that happen to you. I couldn’t let it happen to my m-” Derek abruptly cut himself off and looked suddenly fearful. “I just couldn’t.”

Stiles couldn't say anything as he swiped the tears away from his cheeks. He hadn't expected it to hurt this much when he’d come to see Derek. “Well, newsflash. Relationships aren’t just about what you want. There are two people in a relationship, Derek. But you didn't even give me that chance.”

“And I guess I’ll never know. I’ve never had a real relationship. _Will_ never have a real relationship.” Derek looked at Stiles sadly, blood dripping from his bashed knuckles onto the floor as they healed.

Stiles gave a bitter laugh and tilted his head up, trying to will himself to keep it together. “Yeah, why the fuck not. Because it’s all about you, right? I guess I was hoping if I came here I’d have a reason to try again with you when the spell ends tonight and I go back. Try harder. Beg you. Figure something out. I don't know… I-” Stiles had to turn away as he ran a hand through his hair. “You know what, fuck you. You suck for breaking my heart.”

“And my own,” Derek mumbled to the floor. “Fitting punishment, I guess.”

Stiles turned back around and stared at Derek. “What?”

Derek looked up at Stiles, his face raw with emotion. “I mean...I just…”

“You just what?” Stiles asked, getting frustrated again. “This is your chance. I’m leaving in less than twenty-four hours. This is it. Give me a reason...”

“You’re my _mate_ , Stiles!” Derek exploded, chest heaving. His face twisted and he turned to the wall, leaning against it on his hands, his shoulders shaking.

Stiles was frozen as he studied Derek. He was Derek’s _mate_?! “And you didn't think I deserved to know this?! Really? You were never going to tell me!”

“What good would it have done,” Derek whispered miserably.

“Do you just not want me?” Stiles asked, hurt. “Is that it? Am I just not worthy of being your mate? Because I can't shake this feeling. I’ll have it for the rest of my life, I’m sure. And I can't understand how you can turn away from that. Regardless of whatever your past has been.”

Derek slapped the wall with his palms before whirling to face Stiles. “You still don’t understand, do you? I wanted you, Stiles. More than anything I’ve ever wanted in my entire life. I _still_ want you, I’ll always want you. But you said it yourself, death surrounds me.” He started pacing. “A mating bond… it’s something special. It’s literal. A bond between the two of us that transcends a normal human connection. It would change us, change you. And then, if I died...if _you_ died. Then what?”

“Then it would’ve been worth it. We would’ve had something that not many people get to have for whatever amount of time we’re given. I could die any day walking down the street or driving my car. Yeah, sure, we’re a little more at risk because of all the supernatural crap and I’d be devastated if anything happened to you. I’d be devastated regardless if we’re together or not. Because I love you, even if I never get to have you.”

“Then I guess I was just a fucking coward,” Derek said, voice thick. “I’m still a coward.”

Stiles stared at his feet, hands on his hips, barely holding himself upright at the pain thick in his chest. “It could change… but I don't think I could ever get through to you. I can't even seem to do that now.” Stiles paused and licked his lips. “I leave tonight.”

Derek dropped to the ground and fell back against the wall. “Stiles,” he whispered. “I fucked up, didn’t I?” Derek buried his face in his hands, muffling the sound of a choked sob. “I’m sorry, Stiles, I’m so sorry.”

Stiles swallowed the whine he wanted to give in response to Derek’s sob, sniffling and wiping away his own tears. He stood there for several minutes in silence before walking into the loft and closing the door, moving to sit on the ground next to Derek against the wall. “You know, I wanted a life and a family together. Maybe a dog and a guinea pig.” Stiles tried to smile and knocked his knee against Derek’s.

“I guess...I just resigned myself to never having that. Never being happy.” Derek sniffed and rubbed his face on his sleeve. “I don’t know what you’re going to do when you go back. I don’t know if it’ll make this situation better or worse, but maybe I need to stop being a coward.” He turned to Stiles, meeting his eyes. “I love you. I’ll always love you.”

Stiles stared at Derek, tears fresh in his own eyes and he couldn't stop himself from leaning forward and pressing a kiss against Derek’s lips, tasting the salt of their tears there. “At least I’ll have heard you say it once if I never hear it again,” he whispered.

Derek closed his eyes, leaning his forehead against Stiles’. “Maybe...or maybe this is a second chance. A sign to not give up.”

“Do you want me to try to change it? I don't know what I can do, but I’ll go back to the loft and do something.” Stiles reached a hand up to cup Derek’s cheek, closing his eyes and sniffling again. “We can't be sure anything will happen, especially if you push me away again.”

Derek leaned his face into Stiles’ palm. “It’s selfish of me to say yes. It could fuck up everything, change things in ways we can’t imagine.” He smiled slightly in spite of himself. “But if I know you and your stubbornness… you’ve already made up your mind.”

“Yeah,” Stiles said softly. “I have.” Stiles kissed Derek again and when Derek didn't push him away, it gave him hope that things might change when he went back. “I don't want to leave...”

“You have to,” Derek said, helping Stiles to his feet. “But tomorrow’s a new day.”

Stiles hesitated as he stood there and glanced at the door. “Lydia’s out with Allison shopping for baby clothes… I can stay for a little while, at least.”

“I don’t know if that’s a good idea,” Derek said, stroking his thumb over the back of Stiles’ hand. “Considering how badly my instincts want to take you right now. No matter what your marriage is, what’s going to happen when you go back to your own time… this isn’t the time for it.” Derek smiled ruefully. “I’ll be waiting for you when you wake up. I’m sure of it. For now, go home and be with Lydia.”

Stiles nodded reluctantly and drew in a shaky breath. “If I don't ever get to tell you again, I’ll love you forever. No matter what happens.” He gave Derek’s hand a squeeze and hesitantly released him before forcing himself to turn and walk towards the door. Walking away from Derek was hardest thing Stiles had ever done in his entire life.

Derek gave Stiles a final sad smile, mouthing ‘I love you,’ before the door slid shut.

***

Stiles ended up spending the rest of the day hanging out with Scott while Lydia shopped with Allison. He filled Scott in on everything that Deaton said and left out the Derek parts. When Allison opened the door with loads of bags, they helped her take the bags up to the nursery and Stiles said goodnight to his friends and went home.

He walked into the door and kicked his shoes off, finding Lydia on the couch with a glass of wine. “So I saw all the clothes Allison came home with. How empty is our bank account?” Stiles joked and smiled, moving over to sit next to her and relaxed against the couch.

“Don’t worry, you won’t need to sell a kidney to make the mortgage payment,” Lydia said, smirking. “How was your day?”

“It was good,” Stiles could say honestly. “I spent most of the day hanging out with Scott. Don't worry, he didn't make me try any new werewolf-friendly drugs.”

“That’s good,” Lydia said, looking long-suffering. “After spending the whole day on my feet, I am so ready to climb into bed. Normally, I love to shop, but stores full of babies and small children give me hives.” She took another sip of wine and leaned against the back of the couch.

Stiles patted his leg. “I’ll rub your feet since you suffered all day long. You know if you didn't wear heels while shopping your feet would love and appreciate you.”

“Less chastising, more massaging,” Lydia said, bringing her feet up to Stiles’ lap.

Stiles smiled and took one foot, massaging it just the way he knew Lydia liked. This was something that Stiles knew. Something familiar. And he told Lydia the same thing every time about her heels. “So no babies in the future, huh?” he teased. “Wouldn't want to be stuck in those stores longer than you have to for your god-child.”

“Never say never,” Lydia said, groaning appreciatively when he dug his thumbs into the arch of her foot. “But not until I’m good and ready.”

"Just before you're forty, huh?" Stiles chuckled and smiled before he rubbed her foot. "Maybe we can just get a dog. Or babysit often."

Lydia cracked one eye open and gave Stiles a wry look. “I’m too tired for this conversation right now. Join me upstairs?”

"Yeah, okay." Stiles stood up when she moved her feet and helped her up. He followed her upstairs to the bedroom. "You want me to make you a bath before we go to bed?"

“That sounds wonderful,” Lydia said. “I’m feeling very pampered right now.” She turned and raised an eyebrow. “You didn’t crash the car or something, did you?”

“No, of course not.” Stiles gave her a kiss on the cheek and went to draw her a bath, setting it up with the things she liked to put into it.

Lydia walked into the bathroom in a thin robe, her hair piled on top of her head. She untied it and hung in on the back of the door, smiling over her shoulder at Stiles. “Smells good in here.”

“Well I put the little crystal things in it that you like. And some bubbles.” He smiled at her and shrugged. “You want anything else? Some more wine?”

“This is fine.” She stood up on her tiptoes and pecked Stiles on the cheek. “Thanks, honey.”

“You’re welcome.” Stiles stood there for a few moments before he went back into the bedroom to undress and get ready for bed while Lydia soaked. He sighed when he climbed into bed and pulled the covers up, his fingers brushing against his lips. The first thing he was going to do when he got back was kiss Derek until he gave in to him and the second was a call to Jackson to tell him to stop being a douche and come back to be with Lydia because they were both stupid in love with each other and just as stubborn.

***

Stiles blinked awake and jolted out of his bed. “Holy crap. I’m back.” He touched his not-as-toned-or-hairy chest and looked down at his spongebob pajama pants. “So adult,” he commented and jumped out of bed to hurriedly get dressed. Stiles grabbed his keys and was bounding down the stairs, almost colliding into his dad when he reached the bottom.

“I gotta go!” He said as his dad opened his mouth. “Uh, I’ll be back. Later. Sometime. I’ve got this study thing with Lydia.” Before his dad could get anything out, Stiles darted to the door and left his father standing there with a confused look on his face.

It took Stiles all of fifteen minutes to get to the loft, which was half the time as usual. He brandished the emergency key he had at the door and shoved it into the lock. “Derek?”

“Stiles? What the hell?” Derek asked, sitting upright in his bed, hair tousled. “What are you doing here? Is something wrong?”

“Yes! You are an absolute jerk!” Stiles slid the door closed, crossing the space between the door and the bed in double time. Stiles crushed his lips against Derek’s, cupping his hands to Derek’s face.

Derek pulled back sharply. “Stiles, what’s gotten into you? We went over this last night.” Derek voice was still sleep rough, and he looked completely flabbergasted.

“Yeah, well. A lot’s changed in twelve hours. Why didn't you tell me that we’re mates! I don't care about you being all self-sacrificing. I need you in my life.”

The color drained from Derek’s face and his mouth hung open. “How do you know that?”

“It’s kind of a long story involving magic and being in the future for two days, but older-you told me.” Stiles was still holding Derek’s face, despite Derek pulling away from his kiss. “But I love you and I know you love me. I don't want you to push me away…”

“Stiles, just wait,” Derek said, taking hold of Stiles’ wrists and pulling them off his face. “You’re doing my head in. Slow down and tell me the whole story.”

Stiles looked at his wrists in Derek’s hands and he could feel his throat closing up, like the night before was happening all over again. He was so sure things would be different this time. “I did a spell and it sent me to the future. Twelve years to be exact.”

“And my future self told you we were mates…” Derek said, flushing.

“Yeah,” Stiles croaked. “But we don't talk and we don't see each other anymore in the future… because of what happened last night. And apparently I’ve been married to Lydia for three years, but that’s not the point. You’re making the biggest mistake of your life pushing me away.”

“But if it keeps you safe…” Derek began.

“I’m never going to be safe. Ever. My whole life is filled with people that are supernatural. I still married a banshee in the future! Get over yourself.”

Derek looked shaken, his defenses shattered. “I don’t know how to handle this.” His eyes fell shut and he let out a shaky breath. “I do know that I’ve never felt for anyone the way I feel for you. I’ve never felt real love until I realized why you’d gotten under my skin.”

“I want my life to be with you,” Stiles whispered, almost begging. “I wanna see you get grey hair.” Stiles smiled and snorted a small laugh at that.

Derek was startled into a laugh of his own and he opened his eyes again, turning to Stiles. “I want you so badly, it scares me. You deserve everything.” His hand reached out and he cupped Stiles’ face. “I love you. _I love you._ ”

“ _I love you_ ,” Stiles breathed, leaning into Derek’s touch. “I want to be your mate. Don't push me away again. I can't lose you...”

Derek let out a sob before pulling Stiles to him, kissing him desperately.

Stiles melted against Derek’s lips and groaned softly, opening his mouth to kiss Derek deeply. Stiles found himself climbing into Derek’s bed to straddle him, wrapping his arms around him tightly.

“Fuck, Stiles,” Derek mumbled in between kisses. “What are you doing to me?” He palmed Stiles’ ass and buried his face in Stiles’ neck, kissing and licking, a rumble building in his chest.

Stiles let his head fall to the side, burying his fingers in Derek’s hair as Derek teased his neck. “Not letting you push me away,” Stiles panted, drawing Derek back up for a bruising kiss. “I need you, so much. God, Derek.”

“Mine. You’re mine,” Derek said wonderingly, before grinning wickedly. “Mine,” he growled,  rolling them over and pinning Stiles to the bed, kissing him deep and wet.

Stiles groaned, clutching at Derek’s shoulders and lifting his chin in offering. “God, yes. Fuck. I’m yours.” His thighs parted and he wrapped his legs around the back of Derek’s trying to pull him closer despite all the evil clothes he was still wearing.

Derek scraped his stubble along Stiles’ arched neck, before latching on again and sucking hard. His teeth scraped the tendon, making Stiles shudder. Derek’s hips twitched forward, his hardening cock evident in his pajama pants. “Is this really happening?” Derek panted against Stiles’ neck.

“As long as you don't stop,” Stiles whimpered, pulling Derek up for a wet, needy kiss. “Wanna feel your skin against mine. God, I need you in me. Please,” Stiles panted between kisses. “You’ll be the first and last to have me like this. I’m yours.”

“Oh fuck,” Derek gasped. He pulled back and looked Stiles in the eyes. “Your first?”

“Well, I mean, um…” Stiles flushed. “I’ve never had sex with a guy before. You’ll be my first.”

Derek’s gaze was heated and he thrust his hips again, bumping his cock behind Stiles’ balls. “I love that you’d trust me with this. I promise, no more games. We do this and this is it for me.” He nuzzled Stiles’ cheek, whispering in his ear, “This is it, for the rest of our lives.”

Stiles felt his heart flutter even as his cock hardened painfully. “I’m definitely more than okay with that,” Stiles agreed, running his hands into the back of Derek’s pajama pants to squeeze his ass. “For the rest of our lives.”

“My mate, my _mate_ ,” Derek murmured. “How are you even here right now? How is this real?” He abruptly sat up and tugged at the hem of Stiles’ shirt, yanking it up and off in one motion, before diving back down to lap at one of his nipples.

Stiles gasped and arched against Derek’s mouth, fingers twisting into his hair again. “Cause I do crazy stupid things that end up being awesome?” Stiles released one hand from Derek’s hair to push between them, working the button and fly open on his jeans.

Derek swatted Stiles’ hand away. “Let me,” he said, making quick work of pulling Stiles’ pants and underwear down, leaving him spread out naked on Derek’s bed. Without preamble, Derek bent over and sucked at the tip of Stiles’ dick where precome was beading and dribbling down the sides.

Stiles moaned at the feeling and sight of Derek’s mouth around his cock. It was the hottest fucking thing that he’d ever experienced, right out of his wet dreams. “Oh, fuck. God, you’re so fucking gorgeous.”

Derek hummed in response, and swallowed Stiles further down, flexing his throat around him.

Stiles had to take deep breathes as he let his head fall back against the bed so he wouldn't come right down Derek’s throat. “Mmmm, fuck.” He tugged at Derek’s hair before scratching blunt nails against his scalp, carefully lifting his hips to push his dick a little deeper. “You know, sometime at a later point, you’re going to suck me to get me nice and wet before you ride my cock.”

Derek lifted off Stiles’ cock, gasping for breath. “I’ll remember that,” he panted, before sliding his hands under Stiles’ legs and pressing them against his chest. He folded himself down further on the bed and nosed at Stiles’ balls, darting his tongue out to taste them, puffing hot breaths out through his nose.

Stiles whined, hands moving to grip Derek’s against his thighs, digging blunt nails into the backs of his hands. “Fuck, Derek.” Stiles had to hold onto his own thighs to ground himself, cause _Jesus fuck_ he was going to come before Derek even got inside of him. “You have lube, right?” he panted.

“Don’t worry about it,” Derek murmured, nosing further down until he was licking across Stiles’ hole, nose bumping into his balls. He ran the flat of his tongue over and over the furled muscle before fluttering it against the rim, making noises in his throat like there was nothing he’d rather be doing at that moment.

Stiles was lost in the sparks of pleasure at Derek teasing his hole, causing his dick to leak against his abdomen. The only thing Stiles could do was let his head fall back against the bed as he whimpered and writhed, needing and wanting more.

Derek stopped his ministrations and sat up, his face shiny with his own spit. “Turn over,” he rasped, tapping Stiles’ hip. “And don’t even think about touching yourself.”

“Don't tell me you’re just going to tease me all night with no follow through,” Stiles breathed heavily, letting go of his thighs and sitting up to pull Derek into a kiss. Stiles released him and turned over like instructed, laying on his stomach, his dick trapped against the bed.

Derek tugged at Stiles’ hips until his ass was tilted up in the air. “Patience,” he chided, before spreading Stiles’ cheeks and diving back in, lashing at Stiles’ hole with his tongue, getting it sloppy with saliva.

Stiles keened, burying his face against the bed and twisting his hands into the sheets. Derek’s mouth was absolute torture of the best kind and Stiles pressed back against him, at Derek’s teasing licks and firm swirls, until Stiles was ready to come.

Derek hooked his thumbs into Stiles’ hole, gently stretching it as he continued to lick between them, until he was able to plunge his tongue inside, fucking into Stiles.

Stiles tried as best he could to keep from coming, but with how worked up he was and with Derek fucking his tongue into him, there was no way he could contain himself. Stiles moaned loudly, his dick jerking as he came all over Derek’s bed, hole squeezing tight around Derek’s tongue inside of him.

“That’s it,” Derek murmured. He cupped Stiles’ balls in his hand and squeezed them gently, before reaching through Stiles’ legs and stroking his cock, milking the last few drops of come from it. “Do you want to keep going?” Derek whispered, stroking and touching Stiles gently all over his body.

Stiles couldn't do anything but whine and rock back against Derek in the aftermath of his orgasm, nodding. He breathed, “Please,” when he managed to gather enough brain cells to speak. “Want you inside of me, filling me up.”

“How would you like me to do it?” Derek asked softly. “I want you comfortable.”

Stiles couldn't bring himself to even think about moving. “Like this. C’mere,” he said, reaching back for Derek, trying to pull him over for a kiss.

Derek kissed Stiles deeply, tongue sharing his taste between the two of them. “Like this, then,” he said, shifting to open his nightstand drawer and retrieve a small bottle of lube. He flipped open the cap and liberally slicked his fingers. “Tell me if you feel uncomfortable. No matter what.” Derek tipped Stiles’ face back with his clean hand so their eyes could meet. “Promise me.”

“I promise.” Stiles craned his neck just a little more to kiss Derek again, sloppy and needy from the angle.

Derek sat back, using one hand to spread Stiles open again, the other, using his slick fingers to rub against his loosened hole. With little effort, one finger slid inside to the second knuckle. Derek twisted it gently, stretching Stiles, his breathing becoming more labored as he watched.

Stiles sighed and pressed back against Derek’s finger, trying to lazily fuck himself on it. “Not full enough. Gimme another.”

Derek complied, slipping a second, then a third finger inside Stiles. He rhythmically squeezed Stiles’ ass cheek in his hand as he pumped them in and out. His hips were moving, as though he was already imagining himself inside his mate. “God, Stiles, say you want me now, _please.”_

Stiles was panting and could feel himself already hardening again at the thought of Derek pressed deep inside of him. “Please, _please_ Derek. I need you. Fuck,” he groaned, squeezing around Derek’s fingers.

Derek withdrew his fingers, slicked his cock up then wiped them on the sheets. Putting his hand in the middle of Stiles’ shoulder blades, he guided his cock to Stiles’ hole, pressing forward and groaning as the head pushed past the ring of muscle. He slid inexorably deeper until his hips were flush with the upturned curve of Stiles’ ass. “ _Stiles,”_ he whispered, reverently.

Stiles whined into the bed, fingers twisted into the sheets. “Derek,” he breathed, reaching back to grip Derek’s thigh and hold him tight. Stiles had never felt so full before and there was pain, but it wasn't unbearable as his body adjusted to the size of Derek inside of him. “Mmmn, just stay like this for a few minutes.”

“Whatever you need,” Derek breathed, plastering himself against Stiles’ back. He nosed at Stiles’ hairline and mouthed at the back of his neck. The muscles in his thighs quivered with the effort of holding himself still.

Little shocks of pleasure made Stiles shiver at the feeling of Derek’s body against him and Derek’s nose teasing the back of his neck. The pain slowly eased as his body accepted Derek inside of him and Stiles gently rocked himself against Derek’s hips to test it out. “I think you can try moving now,” Stiles said, giving Derek’s thigh a squeeze as encouragement.

Derek tried a gentle thrust, his eyes fluttering closed as he sighed. “Stiles, this is… you are everything I’ve ever wanted.” The length of his body bore down on Stiles as he continued with a slow and steady pace.

Stiles’ breaths came heavy at the slow, pleasant drag of Derek’s dick drawing out and pressing back in with each gentle thrust. He whined softly as the head of Derek’s cock pressed against his prostate and Stiles shifted his hips, arching his back. “Oh my god,” Stiles moaned, grinding hard. “That feels so fucking good.”

“Stiles, please,” Derek panted. “I need more, just a little more.” He drove his hips in a bit harder. “ _Please_.”

“Yeah. Yeah. Fuck, yeah. Please, Derek.” Stiles dropped his forehead to his arm, filthy sounds spilling from his mouth with need.

Derek started up a faster rhythm, the sound of their skin slapping together a counterpoint to the multitude of noises coming from their mouths. Derek's fingers dug into Stiles' hips painfully, like he never wanted to let go.

Stiles moved his hand to Derek’s on his hip, moaning as Derek’s thrusts became harder and faster, driving Stiles closer to climax with each thrust against his prostate. “Fuck… oh fuck. Derek, _Derek_.” Stiles dropped his head forward, panting and thrusting back to meet Derek’s hips eagerly.

Derek abruptly slowed, despite Stiles letting out a noise of protest. "Wait, wait," he said. "Something's happening. I feel like... Oh god."

“What?” Stiles asked, frustrated. “Why are you stopping? I’m okay.”

"It's just, I'm not sure, but I think..." Derek's voice dropped to a whisper. "I think I'm trying to knot you."

“What? Really?” Stiles twisted his body to look at Derek, as if he could _see_ the knot. He couldn't see much in his position. “That’s really a thing?”

"I, uhh...yeah," Derek said. "It's supposed to be something special, something only mates can do. I wasn't even sure it was real." He shuddered and his hips bucked.

Stiles couldn't help how he pushed back against Derek at the movement, sighing as he squeezed around him. “So then you can knot me?” Stiles breathed, reaching back a hand between his legs to first rub over his stretched hole and then over the base of Derek’s dick to feel it slowly swelling.

Derek whined as Stiles brushed against his swelling cock. "If you let me," he breathed, grinding deeper into Stiles' body.

Stiles let out a desperate sound, suddenly having an overwhelming need to feel Derek’s knot inside of him. “I want you to,” he said, rocking and grinding back against Derek. “I want you to knot me.”

Derek breath whistled in and out of his mouth and he dropped his forehead to Stiles' back. He thrust his hips a few more times before the swollen knot prevented it and he merely jerked and twisted, held firm by the clutch of Stiles' hole. He groaned loudly as he came, filling Stiles with a hot rush of come.

Stiles moaned as Derek’s knot started to swell impossibly tight inside of him. “Derek,” he whimpered, panting. Derek coming inside of him, hot and wet made him feel fuller than he’d ever felt before combined with the feeling of Derek's knot. Stiles whined and bucked as Derek’s knot pressed against his prostate, the sweet pressure building inside of Stiles until it was too much. He shouted Derek’s name, coming hard as his hole squeezed painfully tight onto Derek’s knot, spasming and working it until Stiles collapsed on the bed, ass in the air. “Mmmmmn, Derek. Derek.”

Derek periodically whined as his knot continued to twitch and gush come. He was clinging to Stiles as if he was afraid to let him go. “My Stiles,” he murmured, rubbing his lips against Stiles’ back and neck, not really kissing, just feeling. Their skin was slick with sweat, almost hot with their contact, but Derek made no indication of moving away anytime soon.

Little pants and moans escaped Stiles lips, unable to keep the sounds from spilling out. The only thing he could feel was Derek. The only thing that existed to him was Derek. Derek's touch, Derek's scent... _DerekDerekDerek_. He reached back to touch him as best he could, hands finding hot, wet skin. "I don't want this to end," he mumbled against the bed, well aware Derek would be able to hear him regardless.

“That’s what this means,” Derek said into Stiles’ skin. “I’ll never leave you now. You’re mine and I’m yours.” He stretched himself up and leaned over Stiles’ face, kissing at his cheek and the corner of his mouth. “Forever.”

"Forever," Stiles breathed like a promise that meant more than the word itself. "Forever is more than perfect for me."

**Author's Note:**

> Details for tags - 
> 
> Stiles is transported to a potential future due to a spell. He's married to Lydia, but has no memory of their married life. They have sex, but he hasn't told Lydia that he's from the past because he doesn't want to hurt her. She just thinks he's acting oddly. He never ends up telling her about the spell.
> 
> It's further explained that their marriage is more about friendship than a deep true love and passion. It's implied that Lydia is still in love with Jackson and Stiles with Derek.
> 
> Stiles visits Derek and they confess their love, as well as kiss, before Stiles wakes back up in the past.
> 
> It's also implied that Lydia will get her happy ending with Jackson, if Stiles has anything to say about it. 
> 
> If any of these elements bother you, please give the story a pass.


End file.
